Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
paint
I have been painting a lot in these past few months. For me, painting is a form of meditation. I turn all the filters off in my brain and just let everything out.
I have turned in paintings instead of papers and gotten full credit.
I have turned in paintings instead of papers and gotten full credit.
Monday, August 9, 2010
I'm sorry, you're a WHAT?!
I have been single for three years next week (Hold your applause, please) for various reasons that I quite frankly I don't want to get into at the moment. And being boyfriend-less for that amount of time leads to certain people wondering why and asking questions that are frankly none of their business:
Q: "Don't you WANT a boyfriend?"
A: Yes. But I also don't want to settle for anything less than awesome.
Q: "Are you getting over a bad break up?"
A: Yes and no. The first year or so, yes. The middle year, no. This past year, kind of sort of.
Q: "Has no guy shown any interest in you?"
A: No, there have been guys that liked me. But just because they like me doesn't mean I have to like them.
Q: "Haven't you been interested in any guy?"
A: Yes. And in a few instances it blew up in my face. One instances broke my heart in the worst possible way.
Q: "Are you a lesbian?"
A: Nope. No lesbian tendencies here. Not that there's anything wrong with that.
Q: "What's wrong with you?"
A: None of your fucking business.
Clearly, because some random dude doesn't want to make a commitment to me there must be something amiss.
It really couldn't be as simple as I haven't meant anyone I want to put up with for an extended period of time.
That said, I have recently met not one but two guys that interest me. About a year after getting my heart smashed into a bagillion pieces. And what's nice is they both seem to be interested in me. Both are funny, intelligent, interested in theatre, quirky looking in a good way. It's quite nice, actually.
Here come the complications:
Gentleman Caller 1#: 35, involved with the show I'm in, comic book dork, short and hairy and adorable, currently going to back to school to get his bachelor's degree. We started out just being overly flirtatious and touchy at the bar after shows. I find out 3 weeks into it that he considers himself to be "relationshiply agnostic" (meaning he knows its there, but he chooses not to define it) and he has a lady friend of 2 years.
"UM, P'SCUSE!?"
Not only does he has a girlfriend, (wait for it. it gets worse. wait for it. it gets so much worse. wait for it.) they are swingers.
"I'm sorry, you're a WHAT?!"
Swingers. However, he claims that he does not participate. That he only agrees to it because she is honest about it. Apparently, she is polyamorous but he is not. He said that he doesn't think he'd continue to be in this kind of relationship if they were to break up tomorrow.
I don't even share deserts.
I'm not entirely sure how I feel about this whole thing. I am monogamous. I can't seem to wrap my head around the idea of sleeping with someone that I know is sleeping with someone else. Maybe it's my puritanical, WASP-ish upbringing but EW.
I didn't see him for a week. Stewed in my own thoughts. Brought Gentleman Caller 2# to the show.
Last week, I saw him and we talked about the situation. I don't know if anything was resolved. He did say that his lady friend is going to be coming to the show this weekend and he wanted to know if I was okay with it and with her coming to the bar afterward. I said that I was okay with it but I don't really know if that's true.
MOVING ON.........
Gentleman Caller 2#: Tall, lankly, bearded, awkward, big nose (which I LLLLOOOOVVVVEEEE), red haired, intelligent, age appropriate. I met him through my internship. We talk about art museums and Shakespeare.
I really don't have a lot to say about him because I wasn't sure if I liked him that much. He's very awkward and GC1 is uber confident. But lately, I have been wanting to hang out with him all the time. He's just nice to be around. And its easy. There is no weird relationship situation.
Note how short this section is.
I really like them both. I'm just not used to having two guys like me.
Q: "Don't you WANT a boyfriend?"
A: Yes. But I also don't want to settle for anything less than awesome.
Q: "Are you getting over a bad break up?"
A: Yes and no. The first year or so, yes. The middle year, no. This past year, kind of sort of.
Q: "Has no guy shown any interest in you?"
A: No, there have been guys that liked me. But just because they like me doesn't mean I have to like them.
Q: "Haven't you been interested in any guy?"
A: Yes. And in a few instances it blew up in my face. One instances broke my heart in the worst possible way.
Q: "Are you a lesbian?"
A: Nope. No lesbian tendencies here. Not that there's anything wrong with that.
Q: "What's wrong with you?"
A: None of your fucking business.
Clearly, because some random dude doesn't want to make a commitment to me there must be something amiss.
It really couldn't be as simple as I haven't meant anyone I want to put up with for an extended period of time.
That said, I have recently met not one but two guys that interest me. About a year after getting my heart smashed into a bagillion pieces. And what's nice is they both seem to be interested in me. Both are funny, intelligent, interested in theatre, quirky looking in a good way. It's quite nice, actually.
Here come the complications:
Gentleman Caller 1#: 35, involved with the show I'm in, comic book dork, short and hairy and adorable, currently going to back to school to get his bachelor's degree. We started out just being overly flirtatious and touchy at the bar after shows. I find out 3 weeks into it that he considers himself to be "relationshiply agnostic" (meaning he knows its there, but he chooses not to define it) and he has a lady friend of 2 years.
"UM, P'SCUSE!?"
Not only does he has a girlfriend, (wait for it. it gets worse. wait for it. it gets so much worse. wait for it.) they are swingers.
"I'm sorry, you're a WHAT?!"
Swingers. However, he claims that he does not participate. That he only agrees to it because she is honest about it. Apparently, she is polyamorous but he is not. He said that he doesn't think he'd continue to be in this kind of relationship if they were to break up tomorrow.
I don't even share deserts.
I'm not entirely sure how I feel about this whole thing. I am monogamous. I can't seem to wrap my head around the idea of sleeping with someone that I know is sleeping with someone else. Maybe it's my puritanical, WASP-ish upbringing but EW.
I didn't see him for a week. Stewed in my own thoughts. Brought Gentleman Caller 2# to the show.
Last week, I saw him and we talked about the situation. I don't know if anything was resolved. He did say that his lady friend is going to be coming to the show this weekend and he wanted to know if I was okay with it and with her coming to the bar afterward. I said that I was okay with it but I don't really know if that's true.
MOVING ON.........
Gentleman Caller 2#: Tall, lankly, bearded, awkward, big nose (which I LLLLOOOOVVVVEEEE), red haired, intelligent, age appropriate. I met him through my internship. We talk about art museums and Shakespeare.
I really don't have a lot to say about him because I wasn't sure if I liked him that much. He's very awkward and GC1 is uber confident. But lately, I have been wanting to hang out with him all the time. He's just nice to be around. And its easy. There is no weird relationship situation.
Note how short this section is.
I really like them both. I'm just not used to having two guys like me.
New Directions
I have decided that I will no longer be blogging exclusively about food that I don't like. Mostly because I feel the need to vent certain things and don't feel like starting a new blog.
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Now, I have never eaten this but...
Yes. That is a sandwich. In a can. It comes in peanut butter and jelly (both grape and strawberry) and, brace yourself, BBQ CHICKEN?! Also, there is a candy surprise insThis is just the lastest of premade convenient foods that confuse and disgust me. Like Smucker's Uncrustables. For those of you who don't know, these are premade sandwiches with out crusts. Because apparently having to make your kid a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and cutting off the crusts takes too long.
What is the world coming to?
UPDATE!! The man that has invented the Candwich is being sued. He funded the project by targeting real estate investors. He also isn't paying the manufacturers. So the Candwich won't be appearing on your grocery store shelves until later this year.
Friday, May 21, 2010
Get that raspberry crap OFF my cheesecake!
I love sweets. Seriously, I LOVE THEM! I don't share desserts.
REPEAT: I DO NOT SHARE DESSERTS!!!!!!
God help you if you try to sneak some of my cheesecake or chocolate chip cookie or brownie. There will be hell to pay. And hell hath no fury like a woman denied her sweet tooth.
This brings me to an event that no doubt everyone has experienced. You're at a restaurant. You've eaten your meal and the waiter has refilled your wine glass and offers coffee and dessert. You decide to indulge. Especially after you see that they have your favorite dessert, in this case cheesecake, on the menu tonight. You order excitedly, almost giddy with anticipation of what is coming to your table shortly. The waiter exits the kitchen. He is holding the tray on his shoulder so you can't see it but you are still salivating from the thought of your creamy, delicious, sweet yet with a slight tang, and decadent New York Style cheesecake coming your way. He carefully places the plate in front of you and you smile eagerly at him and your meal companion.
Then you look at your plate.
And it looks like someone murdered a fairy on it. How else can you explain the puddle of red, gloppy goo that your wonderful cheesecake is sitting in?
"Excuse me, but there's red stuff on my plate," you say to the waiter as politely as possible.
"Oh, that's our special raspberry coulis. It's dee-lightful."
"Yeah, well, it looks dee-sgusting."
"Try it, I swear, it's like nothing you've ever had."
"If I wanted my cheesecake sitting in raspberry gunk I would have said so. Can I get one that didn't contribute to the deaths of hundreds of young berries?"
I understand that some people like raspberries. I do. My issue is that a lot of times, the restaurants don't tell you that they're soaking your dark chocolate mousse cake in something that looks like stage blood from a production of Sweeney Todd. If you tell me, I'll ask for no sauce. And don't give me crap about it. If I wanted it, I wouldn't ask for it to not be there.
I don't like fruit in dessert at all. If I wanted something healthy and good for me, I wouldn't be eating dessert. So save your raspberry coulis, strawberry shortcake, apple pie and blueberry crumble for the confused souls that don't get the dessert is supposed to be sinful and orgasmic, not wholesome and nutritious.
REPEAT: I DO NOT SHARE DESSERTS!!!!!!
God help you if you try to sneak some of my cheesecake or chocolate chip cookie or brownie. There will be hell to pay. And hell hath no fury like a woman denied her sweet tooth.
This brings me to an event that no doubt everyone has experienced. You're at a restaurant. You've eaten your meal and the waiter has refilled your wine glass and offers coffee and dessert. You decide to indulge. Especially after you see that they have your favorite dessert, in this case cheesecake, on the menu tonight. You order excitedly, almost giddy with anticipation of what is coming to your table shortly. The waiter exits the kitchen. He is holding the tray on his shoulder so you can't see it but you are still salivating from the thought of your creamy, delicious, sweet yet with a slight tang, and decadent New York Style cheesecake coming your way. He carefully places the plate in front of you and you smile eagerly at him and your meal companion.
Then you look at your plate.
And it looks like someone murdered a fairy on it. How else can you explain the puddle of red, gloppy goo that your wonderful cheesecake is sitting in?
"Excuse me, but there's red stuff on my plate," you say to the waiter as politely as possible.
"Oh, that's our special raspberry coulis. It's dee-lightful."
"Yeah, well, it looks dee-sgusting."
"Try it, I swear, it's like nothing you've ever had."
"If I wanted my cheesecake sitting in raspberry gunk I would have said so. Can I get one that didn't contribute to the deaths of hundreds of young berries?"
I understand that some people like raspberries. I do. My issue is that a lot of times, the restaurants don't tell you that they're soaking your dark chocolate mousse cake in something that looks like stage blood from a production of Sweeney Todd. If you tell me, I'll ask for no sauce. And don't give me crap about it. If I wanted it, I wouldn't ask for it to not be there.
I don't like fruit in dessert at all. If I wanted something healthy and good for me, I wouldn't be eating dessert. So save your raspberry coulis, strawberry shortcake, apple pie and blueberry crumble for the confused souls that don't get the dessert is supposed to be sinful and orgasmic, not wholesome and nutritious.
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